Background Processes
The fears, survival patterns, and old logic that keep running in your mind whether you notice them or not. Some were installed by you, some by your environment, some by people who raised you. This setting is not about stopping them — it is about whether you even know they are there.
The Avoidant Adult and the Walls They Built as a Kid
Background Processes are the fears and survival patterns running quietly in the background without the person's awareness. For the avoidant adult Alex Cooper describes, the background process is a childhood-installed rule: 'needing people is dangerous, rely only on yourself.' It runs automatically every time closeness approaches — triggering the ick, the coldness, the pullback — without the person consciously choosing it. The shift being described is the first step of noticing the process is running at all.